Worst. Melvins show. Ever.
There, I said it. My heroes let me down, though it wasn’t always their fault.
It’s still hard for me to believe that the Melvins’ 25th anniversary show with Green River involved sucked, but it sucked.
Things got off to a great start, with Melvins kicking off the night. They moved drummer Dale to bass and had somebody else drumming while they performed songs from all the way back in 1983, the band’s sludgiest, raunchiest, punkiest stuff. Then they moved into newer stuff, focusing pretty heavily on their most recent studio album, Nude With Boots. And that’s where the suck started.
Since Melvins’ newer stuff is more complicated, a move back to drums for Dale was necessitated. And apparently Melvins couldn’t find a single person who could play bass for their 25th anniversary show. Melvins goes through bassists like Spinal Tap goes through drummers. Invariably they herald each new bassist’s arrival as finally having found the bassist that’s right for them, and just as invariably that bassist leaves amid Buzz and Dale mumbling about how that bassist just couldn’t play right or didn’t play hard enough or didn’t want to keep up with their brutal touring schedule or whatever. And so Melvins has become the Buzz and Dale show with a revolving door of bassists. To this point, that hasn’t been such a bad thing, but when you can’t find a single bassist to play for your 25th anniversary show, that’s kind of a sign that maybe you shouldn’t be such an asshole to all your bassists because your songs SUCK ASS without low end.
Anyway, then Green River came on, and as if to make up for the lack of bass in Melvins’ first set, there was waaaaay too much bass in the sound, which basically cemented Jeff Ament’s position as my second-least-favorite member of Pearl Jam. I generally don’t like being dickish, so I rarely point out to sound guys that their sound is awful, but the bass was so overpowering that it was pretty much impossible to enjoy the songs. The sound guy seemed to be paying attention, in that he was looking at the stage, but he was completely clueless. I damn near said something, but decided to err on the side of not getting punched in the face.
The saving grace for this set was that they did a longer set than at SP20 and really got into some deep cuts, including the awesome “New God.” I’ve had the line “I’m not really asking for much/I only want your soul” going through my head ever since the concert.
Unfortunately, the same problem with the sound existed for Melvins’ second set, which consisted of them doing Houdini in its entirety. And now I’m getting pissed just remembering how bad the sound was, so f**k you Showbox sound guy, you should be fired and should have to reimburse us all for our tickets, since we got such a lousy show. You should also probably burn in hell and be forced to listen to lousy sounding music for the rest of eternity…though apparently that wouldn’t bother you since it didn’t back in May. But I don’t like being dickish….