Miss Piggy Lunchbox

With about two weeks left in faltering, I figured we could now wrap-up the never-snow totals for this year.

If the search functionality on MPL is working right, the last never-snow was here, when Beckers and Isabelita reported never-snow.  That was number 16.  16 conservatively called never-snows (remember, I only counted the monster Christmas storm I was absent for as one never-snow).  Beckers says there was one dusting in mid- to late-May she didn’t report, and if memory serves, My Baby reported never-snow on the Eastside after that, but it was vague enough and far enough away I didn’t count it.

There you have it.  When I first moved here i thought it only never-snowed two or threetimes a year, because that’s how much we had my first winter.  My second winter we were up around double digts, and my third winter we hit 16.  Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go through the ritual of forgetting all of this and enjoy “summer.”

Beckers reported never-snow for at least 5 minutes in Kent on 4/1/09.  I say it was God saying, “April Fools, you live in Seattle.”

That same day, Learning To Sequence reported that it snowed “all morning” about 8 miles north of MPL HQ:

So despite not getting any never-snow at MPL HQ on April 1st, we were surrounded by it to the north and south, so we’re counting it.  That’s number 16 on the season.

In that same post, Learning To Sequence also reported the coldest March on record, which would mean that in the roughly three years I’ve lived here, I’ve experienced the rainiest month ever (November 2006) and the coldest March ever.

KOMO News, though, reports it was actually it was the coldest march since ‘76.  I was born in ‘74, so that’s kind of like “ever.”  It also reports that with the April 1st never-snow that it was Seattle’s 6th-snowiest [sic] season on record at 23.3″  I know 23.3″ isn’t a lot of snow for a place like, say, Minneapolis, but it is a f**k of a lot of never-snow.  You try living amid 23.3″ of never-snow that they don’t move off of the streets.

Cast:
My Baby - My Baby
Friend - a friend who is a transplant to Seattle from New York

My Baby: Lately it’s the kind of cloudy  where you can’t even tell what time of day it is.  You can’t tell where in the sky the sun is and it’s the same level of brightness form sunrise to sunset.

Friend: Yeah, I went out for lunch,  andI thought it was bright, but I still didn’t have a shadow.  It’s weird when you can look at a distinct cloud.  It’s usually so cloudy here you can’t even make out individual clouds.

Cast:
Me - KEN
Friend - a friend who is a native of western Washington.

Me: I finally made my peace with the weather here, or at least made significant strides with it, when I finally lost all expectations.  Now I just expect gray, rainy s**t every single day, and anything better than that is just a bonus.

Friend: That’s how I’ve spent my entire life, I just didn’t realize it until right now.

Who sent me the Mars Volta CD from San Diego?

Thanks.

UPDATE: No, seriously, guys, who sent me this?  So weird….

Friend: …and for the ultimate in obscurity, it was a L’il Wayne song that wasn’t “Lollipop.”

Me: [to My Baby] Hey, now we know who does “Lollipop.” [to Friend] We were in Turkey a few years back and heard “Lollipop” a dozen times a day.

My Baby: No, that was “Candy Shop.”

Friend: That’s 50 Cent.

Me: No no, it goes [sings] “I’m gonna lick your lollipop.”

Friend: Yeah, well, it turns out that the lollipop is a frequently used phallic symbol in popular hip-hop lyrics.

One of my friend Karl’s bands released a new album this year. As you know, it’s MPL policy not to review friends’ CDs, but you should get this.

Mixers: “Fate Won’t Wait”
Non-keepers: “All That I Am,” “On The Bus,” “Fall In Love Again”
Filed Between: Terramara’s Four Blocks From Hennepin and Tesla (The Great Radio Controversy)

Many of you have already seen this, because I’ve done an awful job of keeping my inbox clean lately. (God, e-mail fills me with rage lately.) But anyway, here’s Josh, of Loin Groove and Woodpecker! fame, starring in a short that appeared in the International Pancake Film Festival (that sounds awesome!) last weekend (or Friday or something…I’m totally burned out.) This is NSFW.

Then there’s this, which features Woodpecker! and their song “Nothing Gets Chicks Hot Like A Guy Who Cares A Lot.”

In case you missed the big game, or, like me, were in a room where people had the gall to talk to each other, here’s the ad done by MPL friend ST.

And I get a couple of free posts out of it. So sweet.56 days until Opening Day.

Remember last year when MPL friend ST had a couple of ads in the Super Bowl?  Well he’s at it again this year.  Do a brother a favor and, after enjoying some frosty Bud Light during this year’s Super Bowl (go Pats!), votie-o for the Bud Light ad with Carlos Mencia in a bar as the best one. 

I don’t want to give away the premise, so if it requires more disambiguation after the game, check out this post for said disambiguation.  And, if you’re luck, another vid of the commercial itself.

Rock on.